Tuesday, January 1, 2013

My 2012

I don't know how I'm gonna be able to write this without ruining my make up but I will, for sure, try my best.

As many of you know, 2012 was a really hard year for me and when I say hard, I mean it! I lost my beloved Mom to cancer, which was just the culmination of a series of incredibly difficult times we spent while she was sick and all that process. The process started early this year and got worse with time, until Mom finally left us to go to a better place. It was (and still is) the most difficult thing I've ever have to go through and certainly the saddest, too. 

To this day, I must admit it is still an open wound, slowly healing, yes, but still open and hurting like hell. There are days when I still think it's all a joke from life and I will get her back...then I realize that's never gonna happen and I'd better deal with it, but it's just hard; I know I am on my way but, for me, there's no pressure and I will get there, however long it takes.

On the other hand, this whole experience taught me many important lessons and opened my eyes in so many ways. For one, I learned that sometimes people you love, don't necessarily know what really means, therefore, they will discard that and not give it the importance it deserves; which is fine, cause once you learn this, you're able to decide whether or not you want that people to continue in your life. I did cut a lot of people out of my life but, in my case, I did not cut them out just "because" or because I'm angry at them, or hate them, but because I realized all that people wasn't bringing anything into my life (love, support, comprehension, honesty, -sincere- empathy, etc.) so I didn't think it make any sense to keep them in my life any longer. Hope you're all good and thank you, cause I also learned a lot from you.

Also, I remembered (I already knew but had forgotten) that Family is not that you share a blood type with, but that you share genuine love with; which is amazing, cause that Family is way more honest and sincere and will always be there, and not because they have to, but because they want to. So, I am very happy that I found my very own Family of Love, whom I am quite stoked to share my life with, and even though it's small for now, I'm sure it will continue to grow as I continue to grow as a person.

To my Family of Love (I am not gonna say names cause you know who you are!), thank you, thank you, THANK YOU so very much for being there for me, and not just when it seemed like I needed you the most, but for sticking around even when it seemed like it was all okay -that's what's most important and valuable for me! Hope you all stick around for a long time cause I love you with all my heart and soul.

Last, but not least, I learned that I've had my BFF with me all along, my sister, from whom I have learned most of the greatest lessons there are to learn in life, who loves me unconditionally and who I love unconditionally and be forever grateful with, who picks me up everytime I fall down and who I try to pick up whenever she falls down. Perrow, I LOVE YOU ALWAYS! There's no D without the G!

And well, this New Year, my life will be ruled by 2 main philosophies:

1) YOLO (You Only Live Once)! Cause you do, so, why waste anytime with hesitations and regrets?! YOLO to tha max!!

2) Let It Flow - Yes, I know it sounds a bit too much tree-hugger of me but they say if you wanna make God laugh, you tell them your plans and well, I don't really wanna seem like a comedian to God so I will just let things flow they way they have, everything is easier and sometimes even better, it's certainly more fun, so...just Let It Flow! 

I hope this 2013 all of you reading me find what you're searching for, whatever that is, I really do hope so with all my heart. Hope life brings you joy, and happiness, and fun, and great friends, and travels, and money and, most importantly, LOVE!

Love you all and thank you for reading this tough year! Hopefully, 2013 will be incredibly awesome for us all!


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